As an extroverted HSP, I am a contradiction in terms – I crave overstimulation, but also understimulation. But these tools help.
Walking the fine line between overstimulation and understimulation can be very challenging. I always knew I was more on the extroverted side of the spectrum. I’m always excited to go on adventuresI have a need for novelty, and sometimes being around other people gives me an incredible boost.
However, this is only part of who I am.
I also always knew I had a more sensitive side, although I didn’t always know the term for it – Highly Sensitive Person (HSP). Movies and stories with happy endings (apparently) endless tearsit takes a very long time to process information and I experience my emotions (and the emotions of others) very intensely.
After going through my own journey of self-discovery, the term HSP made me feel at home with myself. The only thing that didn’t affect me was refraining from certain activities like going to parties, traveling, or seeking out new experiences that usually involve extra feelings. These are all things that I deeply value in life and are part of my extroverted core.
Understimulation vs. overstimulation as a highly sensitive extrovert
Considering my interests do it if I interact with the outside world more often, if I don’t take care of myself, I run the risk of being overstimulated because I’m HSP. However, if I don’t get enough of these stimulating activities in my life, I run the risk of being understimulated due to my extroverted nature.
For me, since the highly sensitive extrovert the coolest thing ever – it truly is the best of both worlds. When I listen to music, I really get into it to feel that. When I’m on an adventure with my loved ones, being in those moments is the most emotionally positive thing for me. I experienced being “high on life” from these moments.
For example, when I go out to watch fireworks, my senses are energized by being in a crowd with people whose excitement fills the air. Similarly, I feel the colors of the sky almost alive. The world is full of different feelings that I can experience to the fullest, and it doesn’t make me retreat, it makes me run.
As magical as it can be to me, if I’m not paying attention to how much external stimulus I’m taking in, these beautiful feelings can easily turn into a nightmare of an experience. I am a walking contradiction. However, with the right gaming habits, I can enjoy the wonder in the chaos. This is mine tool kit for the extroverted HSP.
Like what you’re reading? Get our newsletter for HSPs. An email every Friday. Click here to sign up!
5 Ways to Thrive (and Survive) as an Extroverted HSP
1. Earplugs — you can still go out and have fun (but on a limited basis).
I remember the first time I went to an indoor concert. It took place in a relatively small hall filled with screaming fans. The evening started off amazingly well for me. I had a great time cheering with the other fans. But as the night wore on, all the exultation of excitement turned into something else—the source of my misery. My head started to hurt and I found myself less interested in listening and enjoying the music and more focused on protecting my ears.
I found myself mentally and emotionally overwhelmedhe almost desperately wants to go home. That is, until I found some earplugs I forgot in my bag (I went skydiving indoors a few weeks earlier and bought a pair of earplugs). As soon as I put them on in concert, I realized that I could enjoy them again. I no longer felt exhausted as screaming out loud no longer had a negative effect on me. And as the evening went on, I happily enjoyed the concert.
One of the rules I currently follow when hiking is to bring earplugs. That’s not how I understand it too overstimulated or overworked. You never know what an intense yet exciting event awaits you.
2. Take a timeout – You may have the energy of an extrovert, but also feel a lack of energy from being an HSP.
When I was in my second year of university, I decided to try clubbing. I rationalized that I like to dance and listen to live music, so how could clubbing be any different? Spoiler: This is different.
The first time I went to a club, I was maybe halfway through the night when I realized I was tired—not physically, but mentally. I had to leave my friends to find a quiet (or as quiet as possible) place to catch my breath. I remember being confused and asking why I needed a break. After all, I felt good and didn’t feel physically tired.
However, as a very sensitive person, my nervous system is more sensitive to external stimuli. That means I absorb it all what goes on around me, especially the little things. So why did I need a break?
At the time, without realizing it, I was fascinated by the scene I was in—the crowd, the bright lightsand loud musicall things that HSPs are sensitive to. As an extroverted HSP, it’s important to pay attention to when your body is telling you it’s time to take a break, or you could suddenly become overwhelmed. Thanks to the time-out, I didn’t have to leave the club completely. I just had to reload before returning to all overstimulation.
3. Know your limits – and listen to them.
An interesting thing I discovered as a highly sensitive person is that I don’t need to drink too much alcohol to feel buzzed. Due to the nature of our sensitivity, sometimes less is more for us, and that’s okay! (Which isn’t okay if you think you have to drink as much as your non-HSP friends to have as much fun as they do. That’s just not true.)
The important thing is to know your limits and your body’s reactions so that you can make safe decisions for yourself. what your body is telling you. And it doesn’t just have to do with drinking, it has to do with your mental and physical body as well—like using the aforementioned time limits. Bar Highly sensitive people typically struggle with setting boundariesthe key is to come up with a few… and then follow through.
Need to soothe your sensitive nervous system?
HSPs often live with high levels of anxiety, sensory overload, and stress—and negative emotions can overwhelm us. But what if you finally felt at ease?
This is what you will find in it this effective online course Julie Bjelland, one of the best HSP therapists in the world. You will learn to turn off the racing thoughts, end the emotional outpouring, eliminate the sensory overload, and finally make room for your sensitive gifts to shine.
Stop feeling held back and start believing that you can handle anything. Check out this “HSP Toolbox” and start making changes today. Click here for more information.
4. Say “no” – again… and again… and again.
Even though I love going out with my loved ones, sometimes the best way to spend a night in my PJs is at home alone watching my favorite movies. Just thinking about it brings a smile to my face. I enjoy (and really enjoy) low-key activities. Given that HSPs are overwhelmed by our environmentfrom the point of view of our well-being, it is very important to take time to retreat and recharge on our own.
Because of this, we sometimes have to decline invitations. Establishing strong boundaries, as I mentioned above, is a surefire way to find balance in anyone’s life—but it’s especially important for us HSPs. Knowing how to say no a way to do it prevents possible “HSP hangover”, too. I know it can be a challenge at first, but with more practice you will get better at putting yourself first. And again, this is key to keeping our HSP energy working—and building it up for that time. do it decide to be social again.
5. Make sure you have a support system.
Have people in your life who understand your sensitivities truly a blessing. Being highly sensitive is complicated (even for us), so having a support system is very important. Whether your support comes from other sensitive souls or non-HSPs who are willing to learn about you and your sensitivities, confiding in loved ones will be a huge help as you explore the outside world.
After avoiding crowds of people for two years due to the COVID-19 pandemic, one day I decided it was time to re-enter the world as an extrovert. it’s me like this I’m glad I asked one of my closest friends to come with me as it made the journey into town much easier. I forgot how loud it can be. I forgot about random, intense smells.
Over the past two years, being understimulated has been a very prominent feeling for me, so much so that I’ve almost forgotten what it’s like to be overworked. Returning to the city definitely reminded me of it. And I knew it was time to go home when I found peace in an empty restroom. I was the only person there and a sense of peace came over me. It was quiet and still, and the fact that the solitude had such a strong and positive effect on me made me aware that this was my signal: I craved time alone and wanted to go home.
Even though we wanted to visit one more place before we left, my friend was extremely understanding of my situation. His openness to hearing my point of view and his constant reassurance were reassuring. He did everything he could to get home and I’m so grateful for that.
A balance between extroversion and sensitivity
To live my whole life as a highly sensitive person, I cannot deny that I am an extrovert. However, as an extrovert, I cannot deny that I am an HSP. Walking the fine line between overstimulation and understimulation can be a challenge, but I believe that with this toolkit in hand, it doesn’t have to be.
In order to embrace life to the fullest extent possible, we must also embrace ourselves to the fullest extent. Living life at such an intense level can be nerve-wracking, but also the most beautiful. And for that I am grateful.
