“Why don’t you talk more?” is high on the list of things not to say to your introverted friend.
There are a few things that every introvert has been told at some point in their lives. We introverts are used to it, believe me. But that doesn’t mean we love it. And if the person telling us these things is a friend, it bothers us even more – we mentally roll our eyes and want to heave a big sigh.
Thus, extroverts if you have an introverted friendthis list is for you. Here are some things that your “quiet” friend he doesn’t want you to tell them.
5 things your introverted friend doesn’t want you to tell them
1. “Why don’t you talk more?”
This is a very common question but so hard to deal with. What many extroverts don’t understand is that one actually prefers to remain silent. Honestly, that’s how we introverts are!
We like to think. We like to analyze things and create new things. And that means we have to stop talking every once in a while and spend a little (or a lot) of time in our heads.
This does not mean that introverts do not like to talk at allhowever. We do. But we are content to talk much less than extroverts.
Please don’t think that makes us bad friends; in fact, we can be your best friend ever. We love to listen and if you have something to say, we will be patient and attentive. Just please don’t ask why we don’t talk anymore.
2. “Why is it taking so long to reply to messages?”
Introverts spend a lot of time in their own minds – they like to think, process, and think some more, and this requires a lot of concentration. So when a text message appears on their phonethey don’t like being pulled out of their own world just to send a quick reply.
Of course, if a message is about something important, you can expect your introverted friend to drop what they’re doing and respond. But if the message is about something that can be dealt with later, it will probably be postponed.
Since our phone is with us almost 24/7, many people expect us to be easily accessible. at all times. But that’s why introverts who desperately need solitudeit’s natural that they’re not always ready to talk to others—even via text message. That’s why it’s best not to ask your introverted friend why they don’t respond to your messages right away. they will (eventually), don’t worry.
3. “Why don’t you call me more often?”
If your introverted friend doesn’t respond to a message, don’t call them. This is even worse than SMS! What you need to understand about them is that they need some alone time to recharge. Social life for too long exhausts introverts and can overwhelm them both mentally and physically. So when they are at home, they like to spend some time relaxing. Because of this, they probably won’t call as much as others… and they probably won’t take your call – unless it’s prearranged and they have a plan for what they’re going to say. Speaking of (no pun intended)…
Phone calls can be scary too for many introverts. We usually think carefully before we speak, and this can be a problem during a phone call. Why? Because thinking about what to say means taking long, awkward pauses—and nobody likes that. Besides, we introverts don’t like casual small talk, and phone calls usually have that.
Your introverted friend appreciates you and will calls me occasionally. But they can’t call too much because it ends up costing them just shutdown (be it napping, drawing, or any hobby that relaxes them). And solid alone time is essential for them to recharge their social elements. So please don’t ask them why they don’t call me more often.
Do you ever struggle to know what to say?
Someone asks, “Why are you so quiet?” A co-worker corners me when you are exhausted. A friend strives to plan you don’t have the energy for it.
Later he thinks I wish I had said something.
I’ve been there too. That’s why I created it Confident introverted scripts.
That’s over 150 ready-to-use phrases time spent alone, protection of boundaries, energies, social life, etc. The guide is provided by feedback from therapists and introverted colleagues to make sure it really helps when your mind goes blank.
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4. “Why don’t you go out more?”
I know this may seem strange to extroverted people, but some people just don’t like going out that much. they’d rather be at home and not feel bad about it. And your introverted friend is one of those people.
Introverts like to stay at home and spend time with themselves. They like to pursue creative hobbies, laze around watching TV on the weekend, or work on some hobby or interest (from reading to writing to doing puzzles). It is vital that they get this time so that they are refreshed and ready to face the world.
They are introverted do it they like to go out sometimes, but not very often. Social gatherings wear us out pretty quicklyand since going out usually means we have to socialize, we tend to feel uncomfortable when someone asks us to go (unless introverted friendship activity).
As you can imagine, an introvert really they don’t like people forcing them to leave the house and go out. They also don’t like to be asked Why they don’t go out much. They just are, and there’s seriously nothing wrong with it. You have your preferences, and introverts have theirs.
5. “You’re so boring.”
It shouldn’t be hard to understand why one doesn’t want to hear that. It hurts when someone calls you “boring” just because you are who you are – even if they think it’s a “joke”. Like turning down an invitation, a friend would say, “You’re so boring!” Of course, introverts talk less and they may not prefer partiesbut that doesn’t mean they’re boring. In fact, introverts have very interesting lives and minds.
An introvert’s mind is quite active – we are extremely inquisitive, like to think things through and wild imaginations. This is why many of us have creative hobbies such as writing, singing, to play an instrumentcooking, baking, dancing and the list goes on… We like to curl up in bed with a book, watch TV or close our eyes and listen to music. We usually don’t need to be with a group of friends to have fun – we can have fun alone.
So introverts are far from boring. They have a lot of fun alone when you can’t see them. They are interesting and unique like everyone else.
Introverts and extroverts have different preferences—and that’s okay
If you have an introverted friend, you might want to avoid saying these things to them. They probably won’t directly tell you not to… they don’t like confrontation – but they must feel uncomfortable inside.
For all extroverts out there, here’s something to always remember: introverts are not weird or abnormal. Your introverted friend is a little different than youjust as you are different from them and neither is better than the other. If you want to be considerate, please do them a favor and don’t tell them the above. Trust me, your introvert friend will love and appreciate it. 
My fellow introverts, what would you add? Comment below!
